Recent reviews by paimona

This game came out like 10 years ago and the main story still isn't complete, yet you can already wishlist The Long Dark 2. What kinda goofy ass balderdash is that?? The release of episode 5 has just been pushed to the end of the year -- that's a 4+ year wait. Remember when people were furious that the final episode of Life is Strange took 3 months to release instead of 2? Weren't those the days. This game went from being one of my favs to being the bane of my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ existence. Stop playin around already

Not me getting pissed about not finding enough room for all my ♥♥♥♥ in the man's apartment while simultaneously getting pissed about the fact that I'm ruining the sleek minimalistic vibe of his apartment with all my ♥♥♥♥♥♥ tchotchkes

It's such a vibe

A grisly and gruesome fairy tale and a very good piece of folk horror. I assume all the mythical creatures Olle encounters exist in Scandanavian folklore, but either way, pre-existing or fabricated, the execution of these creatures was 10/10. Though, TBH, I didn't feel fully immersed/invested until Pesta's section of the game. From the path leading to the plague-ridden village to the end of Pesta's boss fight -- the game had me in a chokehold. The rest of Bramble, however... very good, worth playing, but there was something lacking in the gameplay that had me playing in 30 minute sessions because I struggled to engage. I kind of expected this and it's not a dealbreaker, but I'm glad it was only a 4 hour experience.

Well. I don't know. Visually, it's a treat. Gameplay-wise, tank controls are tankier than the tankiest PS1 tank controls, which is... pretty unfun. This style of movement worked for the older survival horror games because enemies were slow and you had time to skirt around them. The enemy in this game, however, is extremely fast and kills you instantly. Compounding this issue, you only have 3 lives. Egh

I'm not sure how much longer games can get away with a cool retro aesthetic and good sound design and just blatantly rip off their predecessors without contributing anything new. These games need unique stories and interesting writing or what's the point??

I can't bring myself to give Late Homework a thumbs down because I did feel the need to see the game through to the end. I was pretty impressed by the camera angles and direction during cutscenes because yeah the basic ♥♥♥♥♥ part of me DID get enjoyment out of the aesthetics. And maybe this is why I was so disappointed by the shallowness of the game. I was floored by Hypnagogia and just expected more from this developer, I guess.

INTERESTING. Well-crafted. Intriguing. My ever-continuing search for good psychological horror remains fruitful. What's not fruitful? The job you're given in Threshold. My god, so THAT'S why there's a little mouth in the UI. But this job provides good healthcare, how lucky are we! I love a game that reminds me of the state my country is in.

The gameplay loop is shockingly immersive. There's nothing tedious, here. Every few minutes you discover a new little tidbit of information so that you can begin to put together what you're doing here, why you're here, what the hell is going on...

Not horror in the traditional sense, but if you'd like to ruminate on the future of the planet and what sorts of crapass jobs mankind will have to endure to keep everyone alive, then you'll certainly start to feel some existential dread.

My entire interest in Sable was dependent on the fact that the art and style of the world reminded me of Moebius's comics (Arzach, etc). On this front, it more than delivers. It's beautiful and visually well-designed.

The story is very Kiki's Delivery Service-esque. A coming-of-age exploration of the self. Go out into the world, and find out who you are. Really this just kind of means, what career does your character want to pursue? And you can choose this for Sable, based on your own interests in the game's various gameplay mechanics. Did you enjoy the climbing, the fishing, etc? This is the goal. It's a cool idea!

Your journey is meandering and directionless, which is kind of nice. Drive wherever catches your eye, interact with the environment and NPCs however you like. There's no combat, no threats. You're just vibing with the land. This game is entirely chill. Maybe TOO chill.

You have your goal, but there's no real story. No MAIN story. This would be fine, but side stories are short, and NPCs are shallow. The environmental storytelling is cool, but again is rather surface-level. I wish there was more. Is it me? Is it the writing? The game is just very BORING, to me. I felt like I had nothing to sink my teeth into. I would have loved to have seen more deeply established and compelling relationships with NPCs -- I really feel this is all that was missing.

Also, the technical issues could be frustrating at times. Rarely does calling your bike actually work. Climbing had hiccups, at times, with occasionally not being able to grab onto climbeable surfaces. When you've just spent several minutes climbing an insanely tall structure only to plummet all the way back to the bottom... well.

I also expected better bike customization options, considering your bike is a character, with a name, even. Customization Mad Max or Days Gone style. You don't even get a boost. Or anything that offers additional functions, new ways to interact with the world, whatever. Just a bunch of aesthetic customizations that only slightly alter stats.

I'm not sure I recommend this game. I don't NOT recommend it, it's not bad, it just wasn't for me. Games don't need to have depth, but I prefer them to.

A short journey about choice -- and how, Aren't you so lucky that you're given a choice? You're not even equipped to make this choice, but you're going to make one anyway. Featuring -- a jaunty lil halftime show performed by a tongue-eating louse.

The DLC, which plays as a sort of extra nasty slimy version of Katamari and provides some existential line of thought that I was too tired to engage in, leads into the game Mouthwashing. It's worth your time.

Jesus. Jesus. What the hell was that?? Incredible. It tickled my brain in a way that I truly cannot describe. There's a part of me that enjoys Feeling Bad and Being Disturbed, but there's a fine balance required here where what's presented shouldn't be overly gratuitous, and Mouthwashing hits that perfect balance. Some of the images in this game will be burned into my memory for all time, but at no point did anything feel included just for shock value. Everything had meaning, had purpose. TBH I think this is one of the best horror games I've ever played, maybe because there are not enough compelling psychological horror games, maybe because it's just that good. Don't expect to play this game and feel scared by what's in the environment and don't expect jumpscares -- the horror is, simply, knowing that people like this exist in the world. (The horror is also, being the only woman on a crew, and knowing you're trapped.) This game is UPSETTING. This game is constantly making you play through scenes where you are taking away everyone's bodily autonomy and it's UPSETTING. And entirely effective! Mouthwashing asks, "Who are you in your worst moments?" and offers different perspectives from each crew member. The old philosophical question of, "Are people fundamentally good or bad?" arises. How do you answer when someone's self-serving behavior is so morally wrong that it seems impossible to argue that this person could have ever been "good"? TBH I was more concerned with asking, "Who are OTHER people in THEIR worst moments?" What atrocities will a person commit when there is nothing and no one to stop them? When a person like this doesn't feel shame? Thinks themself the hero?

Mouthwashing is a game that could feel like a walking sim but manages to be utterly compelling. Every scene is interactive in some way or another, and pacing is tight. It reminds me of Paratopic, which jumpcuts frequently between different moments and between different characers' POVs. You're never left lingering very long in any one place or time and I love that format. It can be jarring, but in the best way. I enjoy nonlinear storytelling, especially with an unreliable narrator. Gimme these lil breadcrumbs that slowly make me feel more and more unnerved. "Descent into madness" is my favorite genre and if this isn't the best representation of that in videogame format, then tell me what is. Seriously, I'm taking recommendations.

I found myself looking for the inspirations behind this game because it felt like there were little pieces here and there yanked from so many things I loved. Is the game inspired by Sunshine, and also that one scene in Event Horizon? Is the crash foam inspired by Demolition Man (1993)? Is Anya supposed to look like Shelley Duvall in The Shining? There are a few moments in the game reminiscent of The Shining. Above all, I found myself wondering if Daisuke was inspired by the himbo MC from Pulse/Kairo (2001, Kiyoshi Kurosawa), which is one my favorite horror films that no one ever talks about. Does any of this matter? No. Does it add depth if you care? Yeah.

Anyway. I'm really thinking those psych eval tests the crew took need to be updated. They're clearly ineffective.

First off: No ultrawide support. Why? A modder added UW support ONE DAY after release. Steam players have a longer to wait to play these games and Squeenix continues to just phone in their PC ports. Also, worst photo mode I have ever seen in my life. Like, what is this flaming bag of doggy poo that you have left upon my front porch?

For the rest of the review: Where do I start? This game is WEIRD. I was hoping and praying this game would reflect the strangeness and goofiness of OG FF7 and SHEESH it does, but tenfold. In some ways, this is good, and in a few, bad (what they did with Shinra Manor was absolutely diabolical and unforgiveable). A side effect of Tetsuya Nomura directing? Probably. This man is the living embodiment of "never let them know your next move." I am sort of enjoying not knowing what to expect in regards to the story. You know the Whispers will change some things from the OG, but you don't know WHAT things. It's fresh for new players AND old players. This makes me wonder, however, how I would feel about these remakes if I had never played the OG FF7, or Crisis Core (or even Dirge of Cerberus, EW, since some buffoon decided Nero deserved a cameo). This game presents a story with twists and turns that seem to ride on the expectation that you have already played the previous games. If I were a new player... I'm pretty sure I'd be confused as hell about Zack. Other details get thrown at you with a cheeky wink and next to no explanation, like Cissnei's appearance in Gongaga. Does Nomura really just expect everyone to KNOW, or is this information being withheld until the next game? I personally don't believe this handling of lore to be fair to new players. But, as an old fan, I'm enjoying it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In regards to gameplay, combat is once again absolute aces. Boss fights slap. Minigames are extremely varied, silly and fun -- unless you're going for achievements, then some are a nightmare. The new card game is great and I am a firm believer that every Final Fantasy title should have a card minigame. The piano minigame, tho? ♥♥♥♥ you. I better never see this ♥♥♥♥ again

The open world sections start out fun but may quickly devolve into misery if you're the type who feels an unwaverable compulsion to 100% a game (which I am and it is truly a curse). I loved farting around outside Kalm because it very much mirrors the way OG FF7 opens up to the open world map after you finally escape Midgar. It's a fun, uplifting, adventurous vibe, and it works. You get to learn about the land and connect with it, which is important from a story perspective. However, I spent 8 hours doing everything in this first map, thinking there may only be a couple areas like this, only to get to Junon and realize the entire game would be like this. Each map has about 30 little ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ tasks to do and for the most part you're just repeating the same 4 tasks. It's just godawful, especially in Gongaga and Cosmo Canyon which are hell to navigate. I honestly don't understand what is so wrong with linearity. FF7 Remake was extremely linear but it WORKED. It was satisfying! It flowed! It didn't waste your time! It respected you as a player! I would have loved for this game to be linear, as well. There are enough minigames and story-centric sidequests to let you linger a bit in each area and I feel that would have been enough to achieve whatever they were trying to achieve here. Is all this perhaps a bit of an empty complaint because I could technically skip everything optional YES, YES and now that I have the achievements I will NEVER do anything optional upon replaying. But head's up: if you want the achievements or are a perfectionist/completionist, you are going to have a Very Bad Time.

Anyway, as annoyed as I was by all the optional crap, once I got to the last two chapters of the game... oh man. Those last two chapters were so absolutely sick and so gorgeous and so emotional that I just kind of forgave everything I hated about this game. Because, please know, I had very mixed feelings during the course of this game. But, the final overall impression was very positive and I'm looking forward to Part 3.